Have you ever heard someone speak in double entendre?
Their words could have one meaning or the other
.
Or you could say something from one perspective
But their mindset renders your words ineffective.
And because their mind has a different skew
They can repeat your words, nod their head
But the meaning is a different view.
.
When I was a little girl
I lived in a Victorian home
Grammy lived down stairs
It was a safe loving zone.
.
Stained glass; mahogany wood,
Thick banister railings,
Pocket doors, lace curtains
Our paw footed dining table
With paisley engravings.
.
A cut crystal punch bowl
An embossed silver crumber
A baby grand piano
Gold trimmed china & glass tumblers.
.
My mothers’ mink and fox stoles
With the foxes head & feet still attached.
When you squeeze the back of the foxes head
The mouth opens to be used as a clasp.
.
A floor model Zenith
A big black Buick
Felix-the-Cat clock tail & eyes sway
Back & forth with each tick.
.
An Easy Bake Oven,
Summer camp in the woods,
A doll house, bikes, skates
My childhood was really good.
.
The youngest of four
My concerns revolved around
Doing well in school, going to church
The choir and my sepranino sound.
.
Silk party dresses
With a hoop petticoat
Private school, ballet lessons,
A cherry tree to climb; a lawn to mow.
.
A steel gray wool coat
With a fox muff and big fluffy collar
White Alligator Mary Janes
A savings account for my birthday dollars.
.
My chore was to wipe the baseboards
With a soft cloth,
My brother cleaned the gutters -
My Father did outside work, going non-stop.
.
I was lying on my husbands’ roof
Cleaning out his gutters
I told my white sister in law ‘This is a lot to do”
Internally reverencing my brother.
.
In her sing song-y patronizing tone
‘Yes a house is a lot of work’
I never would have said anything
If I’d known she’d be such a jerk.
.
Always trying to make me one of the disenfranchised
This woman was hell bent
A house is a lot of work but my family used to do it
But I don’t think that’s what she meant.
.
Her song continued
“We’re products of our environment.”
I remembered love, inheritance & support.
But I don’t think that’s what she meant.
.
“Your Black! Your Black!”
Her emotions no longer pent.
I thought of hard work & dedication.
But I don’t think that’s what she meant.
.
Once we’re better acquainted
You’ll see differently
My minds voice said
“This is what I get for marrying beneath me”
.
“How can I!? It’s right in my face.” She continued
Your $1/2 million dollar house with neighbors mostly Caucasian
Your ugly behavior
That’s what I get for marrying beneath my station.
.
I was clearing the perimeter of my husband’s house
35 years of overgrown brush.
His cousin lived two doors down
‘You can clear my property too since you like doing it so much.’
.
He had a big tree with a horizontal branch;
The type great for a swing,
Or the support for a tree house -
A place for a child’s imaginings.
.
“Just don’t cut down that branch.
That’s a good hangin’ branch.” he said.
I know I heard him correctly.
A picture of lynching flashed in my head.
.
His other cousin, to break the tension asked
“Can I get you anything?”
I envisioned the noose around my neck
“Like what? A stool…
So you can kick it out from underneath me?
.
Yeah, it’s a good hanging branch
For a swing or support because it’s not bent
But no matter how I try
“I don’t think that’s what he meant.”
*
